Separating sensibly: what is the cost of intentionally delaying divorce?

Modern life was already busy, hectic and stressful before inflation went sky high and recession bit. Financial stress can often be the last straw for a struggling relationship so tougher times often, sadly, lead to people splitting up.

Moving out and leaving any other issues of problems for another day can be very tempting. It might even look like the least costly option which seems great at a time when we’re all (rightly) cutting back on spending. When anything but the cost of keeping a roof over your family’s head, heating the home, feeding and clothing its occupants feels like a bit of an unnecessary luxury. It’s not at all surprising that lots of people are making this choice.

The apparent simplicity of joint property ownership quickly evaporates when only one adult remains living in it. Thoughts can quickly turn to, perhaps dwell on, matters such as compensation for no longer living in the house, unmatched spending on home maintenance or improvements. The cost of a properly considered declaration of trust at the point of separation could be less than a quarter of the cost of complicated legal proceedings later down the line.

Then there’s the possibly unwelcome news that your former partner has a new ‘plus one’, or is perhaps expecting a new child with someone else. In even the most cordial and civilised separations this step-change can be the trickiest to navigate, stretching finances, emotions and time ever further. Looking to the future now can help.

Finally, the thorny issue of sharing pensions is relevant to those who are married or in a civil partnership. Workplace pension schemes see many people contributing to pensions on a regular basis, with the value of the pensions hopefully growing in the background until retirement. Even though they are in sole names, they are very much on the table for sharing upon divorce or dissolution but a court order is needed to achieve that. Waiting to get one could hugely increase the amount of pension provision that will be lost by one person (gained by the other) and/or the costs of establishing with a fair degree of precision how it should be fairly shared.

Some things never change – the proverb, “a stitch in time saves nine”, has never been truer. Early advice saves thousands.